New post from Lisa Haigh

It’s Over, I Have Officially ‘De-Friended’ You … On Facebook

Sunday, August 12, 2012

Wow, what a week it has been on social media. There were days I logged on and actually had anxiety after watching all of the heavy status updates and logged immediately out. Ok, we all know that’s not true….I poured a diet coke and watched all the craziness. But, it actually saddened me to watch grown adults act more childish than anything I have ever seen volunteering in Blake’s classroom. The first thing that happened was my friend and a Doctor I work very closely with made a few comments on some before and after pictures (that were extremely mis-leading from multi-level sales rep for a skin care line). He nicely suggested using photos that were more legit. These pictures were horrible. In the ‘before’ the lady had on no makeup, her hair was greasy and un-brushed, etc. After using this skin care regime she appeared to have had a new hairdresser, just left the MAC counter at Nordstroms, finished invisalign treatment, had lower eyelid surgery and drives a new Lexus. Our Doctor very fairly stated that in our industry, we are held to a high standard in our before and after photos and that she should post some which are more evenly matched. The girl in the picture seriously didn’t even have the same eye color. Seemed like a fair request, right? The lady responded by emailing me to tell me that she was so upset she was going to…. wait for it………… ‘de-friend’ my Dr. on Facebook, and not only was he de-friended….he was ‘blocked’…so there. Now that is the ultimate rejection on Facebook and you know it. How old are we?

Then later in the week we had the Chik-fil-a controversy. I do believe that If I were to speak to Mark Zuckerburg he would confirm that August 1st was National ‘de-friending’ day on Facebook. Early in the day status updates started as everyone taking their position, people feeling out who was team chicken and who was not. As the day passed clearly nobody had gone to work because the news feed was crazy all day with everyone fighting their position on each other’s walls, some people at it all day long. By the time I checked my account at 10:00 p.m. the most common final posts for the day were, “De-friend me NOW if you ate at Chik-fil-a today” or “I am de-friending every one on my friend list that ……” and I saw just as many people on the other side posting pictures of themselves devouring a chicken sandwich like they hadn’t eaten in months.

Have you noticed that you can gauge where you stand with someone by checking Facebook? After an argument or a break-up have you checked to see if your still ‘Facebook friends’? I know you have. Or if you think someone had a falling out but you’re not sure, what do you do? You log on and check if they are still Facebook friends. Is this really where we want our relationships to go?

A long time ago my husband said his extreme dis-like for Facebook was how un-authentic the relationships were. He believes that if you are thinking about someone you pick up the phone and call them. Have a real conversation, period. I have always laughed and explained to him the impossibility of staying in touch with 729 friends. How will I know exactly who is eating dinner? And when they are eating dinner? And pictures of said dinners, when would I see those? Yes I know, I have posted pictures of my dinner also. Guilty as charged. I will stop that I promise.

This past week I couldn’t help but really heed his advice. After seeing all of the temper tantrums, and ridiculous behavior on Facebook it made me connect in a more intimate way with the people who matter to me. Like calling them. While social media is a fabulous resource to keep in touch with friends and family and promote your business while learning about other businesses, that is all it is and all it should be used for. Instead of spending the entire day on it and letting it serve as your social life, get off of the computer and call your friends, meet people in person if you can. Stay connected in the real sense and observe, face to face, how people are really doing. On Facebook, people generally don’t post horrible pictures of themselves saying how much their life sucks. However, they will tell you, or you will figure it out in person.

Anyways, that’s my rant today. I hope everyone has recovered from last week and can be a little less dramatic on the internet this week. I need to run and take a picture of the dinner that I am not making tonight….maybe I can steal one off of Pinterest to post while I’m actually eating a Lean Cuisine.

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Random Thoughts, The Way Things Are


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