Lisa's Face It Blog

Our Lips Are Sealed

02 August 2017

Our Lips Are SealedMonths ago, I received an email from a Dr. Susan Schroeder in Colorado Springs, who explained that everything ages and wanted to rejuvenate Erin’s and my lady bits. EVERYTHING? I narrowed my eyes. ... read more »

Lisa Haigh | in FaceIt and Other News

Superficial Vains

30 April 2017

Superficial Vains I picked Erin up from Starbucks, where she lives. I don’t usually “want” to get an IV unless I am in active labor or have eaten sushi from a strip mall (*also with Erin). We rolled up to this super chic IV place in a swanky part of town and were greeted by the second hottest dude I have ever seen (the first was the emergency room doctor who informed me I had gas, not appendicitis). I batted my eyes and casually purred, “I would just like something to reenergize me from all of the pilates and yoga I do. I am super flexible. ... read more »

Lisa Haigh | in

Here's The Skinny

19 July 2016

Here's The SkinnyI was recently contacted by a Coolsculpt representative who wanted Erin and I to have our fat frozen off in exchange for a review of the procedure. Technically, I did not consult Erin prior to agreeing to this, but she owed me. Erin took us to get Brazilian waxes on our last field trip together and then laughed hysterically when I insisted she drive me to the hospital to get a rape kit after. I decided 6:30am was the perfect time to call and inform her of what we were doing. ... read more »

Lisa Haigh | in FaceIt and Other News

Disco Party

07 March 2016

Disco PartyI wanted to go to a Korean bathhouse so I could blog about it. I have a total domineering personality so, it was not terribly challenging for me to convince Erin to go. These bathhouses are all the rage in California. Erin is going to act like a whiney little bitch when she tells her side but, I honestly had no idea that the bathhouse we went to was a covert sex house. Swear. To. God. ... read more »

Lisa Haigh | in FaceIt and Other News

A Hairy Situation

03 March 2016

A Hairy SituationThe Korean bathhouse was indeed traumatizing, but the psychotherapy and shock treatments I have been receiving are totally helping. Annnnd while I was homecoming queen in high school, it wasn’t as though I made a shadow box containing my tiara in memorandum of this momentous occasion. People probably assumed I was a stuck up little bitch when I ran off the football field in front of hundreds of people after I was crowned. In truth, this event served as foreshadowing to what would later be diagnosed as a “severe anxiety disorder.” ... read more »

Lisa Haigh | in FaceIt and Other News

Supplemental Income

01 March 2016

Supplemental IncomeThree days before I nearly died, I was laying on Erin’s bedroom floor after raiding her closet. *If you ever need to borrow a dress she has quite the selection. In fact, she has her very own expensive department store. You would not know this by looking at her since she wears yoga clothes every.single.day. She swears she’s not depressed. I am totally going to say something if she stops showering. ... read more »

Lisa Haigh | in FaceIt and Other News

Nobody Really Knows

25 August 2015

Nobody Really KnowsI’m a few minutes early to a meeting so I sit out front in my car. Don’t be nervous. Don’t be nervous. Eeeek, this totally feels like a first date. I finally walk to the door and am greeted by a totally normal suburban mom. She leads me to her kitchen table where I silently sit while she shuffles through papers clearly unprepared. Meanwhile, her dog is Losing. His. Mind. barking in the back yard. I have already decided that her neighbors hate her guts. As I sit, I glance down at a piece of paper with her bio on it. Interesting lady; ER nurse, massage therapist, birthday party face painter and today ……..my psychic. What? Like I’m going to let her paint my face? That would totally break me out. ... read more »

Lisa Haigh | in FaceIt and Other News

Here's Your Sign

25 April 2015

Here's Your SignOk, so I was totally going to publish a skincare blog this time I swear. {Ok that’s a lie}. I feel like if you are reading my blog only for skincare answers you might just want to make an appointment with me, because lately we have other things to discuss. Like, I don’t think God likes it when you try and make deals with Him. At all. Turns out He’s not the betting kind. ... read more »

Lisa Haigh | in FaceIt and Other News

And This Is All I Have To Show For My Sixty Dollar Co-Pay

08 November 2014

And This Is All I Have To Show For My Sixty Dollar Co-PaySo, I’ve been sick like….well all year. I’m the only person in my family that takes Juice Plus, drinks wheat grass, kale, and spinach, finds my Om’ and continues to house every possible virus that needs a place to dwell. My taco bell eating, not so namaste’, wheat grass despising friends …not so much. They are all healthy and totally annoying the shit out of me. Catch something already. ... read more »

Lisa Haigh | in FaceIt and Other News

Facebook: Bringing People Together and Ending Relationships Since 2004

22 July 2014

As many of you know, and I openly admit, I have committed all of these Facebook annoyances at one time or another. However, I feel that I have matured in my social media ways and am ready to talk about how truly annoying facebook can be. Let’s discuss the narcissism and strange behavior it brings out in people, and the good stuff ... read more »

Lisa Haigh | in FaceIt and Other News

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